Abigail

Toddler finds Cat in the Hat cartoon annoying – watches anyway

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Peabody toddler Abigail Moore admitted that she “actually hates” WGBH’s Cat in the Hat cartoon, but she continues to watch it on occasion because it’s more fun than “doing whatever her parents want her to do instead.”

I legitimately like Curious George, but I put up with Martin Short’s incredibly grating voice and poorly-conceived hijinks only when I need a little space… or when he’s explaining how a bee hive works… bee hives are pretty cool.

This is a bad post, but it’s really just to demonstrate uploading and inserting an image into a blog post and I thought it might as well feed google at the same time. Beats lorem ipsum delorum does it not?

I can’t believe we’re still watching this crap!

The Papa Whisperer

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Sometimes it’s difficult to be a toddler. You have short legs, you have limited funds, and you have trouble making your way through crowds on your own.

It’s difficult to find good help.

“Perhaps my lazy father is right,” thought Abby. I had considered this very Papa project last summer.

Jim was difficult to control at first. Abby had quite a bit of trouble steering him by his hat, and she nearly toppled off several Marblehead sidewalks and piers.

Within a month, however, Jim was quite broken, and Abby could easily maneuver him (by two baby hands full of endangered Papa hair) from ice cream shop to toy shop as necessary.

Peabody mother solves swing-shortage problem!

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Middle East-like tensions defused for now!

Peabody, MA –  Trudi’s quick thinking halted a potentially violent toddler showdown at a local playground on Wednesday.

Asked about her heroic actions, Trudi replied, “it came down to simple mathematics. There were three kids and two swings, so a little sharing saved the day.”

Trudi’s actions were not entirely without controversy, however.

Emily Moore, a mother witnessing the swing sharing commented, “well… it worked out fine this time, but I wonder about the future implications of such a short-sighted solution. What happens when these two find themselves embroiled in a spirited game of musical chairs? Will they now feel empowered to throw the rules out the window and to share that one remaining chair? Do we then give them both a trophy? All I’m saying is that it’s a really slippery slope. I’m not entirely against sharing, but it’s usually a bad idea.”

 

We have Splashdown!

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At a little after 7:16PM on Sunday, January 23, 2011, Abigail climbed atop the U.S.S. Elmo RSTTU (Regular Sized Toilet Top Unit). Following a 12 minute sequential countdown conducted by Commander Emily Moore and Chief Potty Officer Nancy Rooks, Abigail successfully dropped VBM (Verifiable Brown Matter) into the upstairs toilet. Pandemonium ensued!

Great work, men! Operation Splashdown is a success!

Outrage!

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Oh the humanity!

Let the record show that between the minutes of 11:37AM and 11:46AM on December 27, Abigail slaved to produce out of newly fallen snow an 18 inch replica of a snowman. Abigail named her magical new Arctic friend “No Mun.”

Between 3:57PM and 4:02PM on December 27, all available evidence suggests that Joanie unceremoniously* kicked “No Mun” over in a frantic attempt to enter 5 Linden. As “No Mun” toppled, fracturing into his three major spheres, Joanie was heard by Nancy to say, “gahhh… I just got snow on the top of my Uggs!,” after which she proceeded to stomp “No Mun’s” little snowman face to an unrecognizable white powder.

*When asked about the incident, Jim insisted that there was “absolutely no ceremony in the manner of that kick. I’ve never seen a snowman go down so quickly, so violently, so unceremoniously.”

There’s still time!

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Santa and me are really close!

Your Xmas shopping window is measured in hours now, but there’s still time to get that perfect Abby gift!

Blah blah blah… have to go put the baby in the backpack right now.

Blah blah blah. No one reads this far any way.

Blah blah blah. Carolina Panthers suck really badly.